FARE THEE WELL!

I worked in a public sector bank for over three decades. That meant regular transfers. I had a fair share of those – just 15! The best thing about those transfers was that almost every other transfer was to Bangalore.  That also meant no serious dislocation for my children’s schooling. Now, why did I refer to this?

Transfers meant farewell functions and every time I was transferred a function was organized by my colleagues to bid me good-bye. Ando so in 2003, when the last of such functions in the bank was held I assumed that that it was the last farewell function – but God willed otherwise!

My afternoon snooze was disturbed by a phone call from Manipal Universal Learning one day in November 2008. A sweet voice asked me if I could come over for a discussion with MUL officials. I checked to see if she was calling the right person! After confirmation, I did go, met the General Manager HR who found my credentials good enough to be a member of the faculty in their training academy. And that was when I ran into my good friend Dr. T.V.N. Rao (He was my son’s professor and even today my son goes gaga over his teaching skills). After that, as they say, rest is history.

I joined the academy and spent about 15 months when I was given a farewell. Farewell is the time that most of us like because that is when you hear a lot of nice words said about you! The only curious thing about it is that many of us start believing that we really merit those words! Little did I imagine that I will join Manipal again and spend quite some time there!

August 2010, my friend Dr. Rao called me and asked me if I can join him again. I did and what a fine spell has it been!

This time around I did not have to work at the academy but worked at Towers and it was a good experience. Drafting contents for a MBA course was my major task. Alongside I also helped designing some courses which found ready acceptance at the hands of the client banks.

I had not realized then that great times were ahead of me. MUL were able to persuade a giant public sector bank to adopt their training methodology. Dr. Rao suggested that I be involved in that project from the beginning and I had the pleasure and privilege of designing the course structure, drafting the contents and presenting them before the Bank’s senior officials for acceptance. I felt elated when a General manger of the Bank said ‘if this has been prepared by a … Bank official, there is no need for us to scrutinize that. It must be good!’ Such was the brand image of the bank in which I had worked!

And so the design and content were accepted and logically, I became a member of the faculty of the new School. It has been a great experience! The fact that many ambitious youngsters come to you in quest of knowledge is itself an elixir; add to that good words from your bosses – you are on top of Everest or should I say Kanchenjunga!

This spell spread over 20 months saw me foray into hitherto unchartered (for me) territories. From what I hear from the students of the first five batches that I have interacted with, I seem to have connected well with them. They may not have hailed me as a great teacher but they have accepted me as a person to connect with. But one thing every batch conveyed to their juniors was that I am a strict person. This is an image I am unable to live down!

This year my wife and I decided that we visit our daughter, her husband and her children in USA and so I requested MUL to relieve me by end April. As ever, graciously they agreed and yours truly is leaving MUL (now named MaGE).

My colleagues at this school got up a pleasant function to bid me good-bye and our ever affable Director graced the occasion with his presence. How nice of him! I know how busy he is and so for him to spare about half an hour for me is something that I should be proud of! I thought this was the last of the farewells that I was going to have. But ‘no’ said my students!

Today when I went to two classes to bid good-bye they greeted me with loud cheer, gave me a beautiful ‘farewell card’, and persuaded me to cut cakes. And sang! These were moments that would be forever be etched in my hearts. You will have to be my age to realize the importance of this. At my age I should feel happy if youngsters choose to give me the time of the day. But here I was being accorded standing ovation; everyone wanting to have a photo with me! This was sheer bliss. May God bless all these youngsters!

It only brings back to my memory the old saying ‘farewells are not final” and the following quotes:

Good bye may seem forever. Farewell is like the end, but in my heart is the memory and there you will always be - Walt Disney

It's been an incredible ride. Mission accomplished. With that, I have to bid farewell. I'm the happiest person in the world right now. It's better than I ever thought it would be. - Jerome Bettis

The world is round and the place which may seem like the end may also be the beginning.
- Ivy Baker Priest

Goodbyes are not forever. Goodbyes are not the end. They simply mean I'll miss you until we meet again.

Nothing makes the earth seem very spacious as to have friends at a distance; they make the latitudes and longitudes

Don't be dismayed at good-byes. A farewell is necessary before we can meet again and meeting again, after moments or a lifetime, is certain for those who are friends.

Why does it take a minute to say hello and forever to say goodbye?
 

Can anyone please give me an answer to this? 

Sayanora

Weigh less, Pay less!

There was an interesting piece of news a couple of weeks back! Samoa (not samosa, if you please) Air charges fliers by the kilo!

The airline claims that this is the fairest way of travelling (I think it meant fairest way of charging!).

The passengers are required to indicate their weight and weight of their baggage at the time of booking the tickets and these will be physically cross checked at the airport.

If the different airlines operating in India were to adopt this, I imagine the following scenario:

1.      There will be a clamour for going lean as we do not want to pay more for anything let alone airfare!

2.      People would look hungry but will not eat for fear of adding to their waistlines.

3.      Demand for sugar will come down and so will its price

4.      Sweet shops will have less business.

5.      Exchanging sweets during festival times will become an obsolete practice.

6.      Sports shoes (walking shoes) may be in great demand and so their prices may shoot up – everyone would like to go thin - you see and have that emaciated look!

7.      Walkways will be crowded – morning walk will become serious business. There will be clamour from different political leaders (particularly from those Netas who need more than one chair to seat themselves!) that the government of the day is not worried about those wanting to slim

8.      Gymnasiums will have a rush of applicants – they may have to open several new outlets – good business opportunities! Banks may look at this as an appropriate lending avenue!

9.      People who do not want to go outdoors will buy exercise equipment – their prices will soar.

10.  Dieticians will start charging more for their advice – since you pay less for air travel pay more for advice – law of balancing numbers!

11.  Chocolates will cost less – there will be no demand.

12.  Invitations for lunch/dinner will be politely declined – people’s mannerisms will improve. And so all the wayside fast food joints will have fewer customers and so less litter all over!

13.  Public transport systems will accommodate more persons per journey than before.

14.  Yoga gurus will start advertising that their school of ‘going thin’ is the best.

15.  On line courses on slimming will mushroom.

16.  TV channels will use prime time for shows on slimming. And anchors who are obese will find it difficult to come across as effective debaters as people start believing that only ‘the thin’ are ‘believable’

17.  Expert panels will shriek (!) that the governments are intruding into the citizens’ private lives by indirectly forcing ‘slimming’ on the unsuspecting (!) public

18.  Opposition parties will see this as a ploy to keep those BPL permanently in those strata!

19.  The unfortunate few who cannot reduce their waistlines will try to pair with thin passengers and request the airlines to treat them as a package and thus try to keep their airfares low.

20.  Tailors will have a field day altering the measurements to fit the new size!

21.  Hotels will clock less revenue as eating will be considered a luxury nay blasphemy!

22.  The household budget needs on food items will be reduced and demand for food items will decrease resulting in its inflation coming down to single digit from the present two digits!

 

With this single measure, the Nation’s health will glow! How ingenious!

The airlines will check your weight at the airport and collect the difference in fare, if you are weightier than before. But will they refund if you become lighter since booking the ticket?

We have to wait (weight) and see!

Today’s newspapers talk of charging for even your check-in baggage which hitherto was a freely allowed item. May be our airlines are preparing for the day when all the passengers go thin, their revenues fall and so compensate by charging for the courtesies hitherto extended free!.

 

Manners

Manners

 All of us have been brought up to believe that ‘manners maketh a man’. And so being well mannered must be second nature to all of us. But look around you and you will find scores of men and women whose manners leave you unhappy.

I have been observing people from all walks of life over the last six decades and have often wondered how is it that people choose to be lacking in manners. All the literature, our parents, our teachers, other elders have insisted on our being well mannered all the time – remember our school days – you are told to be on your best behaviour when the Inspector of Schools visits your class; in your office, you have to be well mannered when your Chairman/President visits your office. Given this kind of training in our lives, it surprises me that many of us are ill-mannered!

I have been compelled to write this piece as I often see how ill-mannered people can be in office life. We spend major part of our lives in office and it is therefore necessary that we respect and get along with others in as polite a manner as possible. People who have implicitly obeyed commandments when they were subordinates are the ones who in their ‘other avatars’ as bosses are most ill-mannered.

It is considered the most courteous thing to offer a seat to whoever visits you in your office/home. It is good manners to attentively listen when someone is speaking to you.

When I see someone not offering a seat when you enter his/her cabin, whatever be your station in life via-a-vis the person you are visiting, I feel revulsion. Worse still, the person carries on with his work on the computer indifferent to your presence. He/she does not even raise his/her head to enquire what the purpose of your visit is. I am fairly certain that he/she is not dealing with such grave matters of earth (or for that matter of heavens) that his/her work cannot be deferred for 5/10 minutes. (I know that these persons, most of the times, are busy sending e-mails (most of them on inane subjects) to his/her colleagues (I am using the dignified word –colleagues) - these persons would insist on calling them subordinates only!  And he/she expects that he/she will be respected! How incongruous!

 

Then there are people who preach something and practise something else. For example, in some academic institutions, use of mobile phone by students is a strict no-no in the campus. The person/s who framed the rules do not hesitate to destroy the phones if they find students using them. They will frown at members of the teaching fraternity allowing their mobiles to ring. But what do they do? They can use their phones wherever they are. Even when they are in some meetings, they will be receiving/initiating calls totally indifferent to the presence of others and without even a courteous ‘excuse me’ (causing annoyance to the participants). I am not sure if they are discussing earth-shattering and death-defying matters that do not brook delay!

If these are not bad manners, I request you to tell me what ‘bad manners’ is!

These people perhaps are not aware of (and if they are aware, are indifferent to) the fact that bad mannered people are abhorred by society and they become misfits in society. People remain away from them because they cannot stand them or because they create a non-conductive atmosphere around them. We have to decide which side of the fence we want to be. Man is a social animal and society is our base so manners have to be a part of our life.

Perhaps we need to follow Margaret Mead who said ‘I have a respect for manners as such, they are a way of dealing with people you don’t agree with or like’

"Manners are sensitive awareness of feelings of others. If you have that awareness, you have good manners..." said Emily Post.

“MANNERS MAKE THE MAN, A GENTLE MAN (AND OF COURSE WOMAN TOO)”

 

 

 

 

How to present your accomplishments?

 

How to present your accomplishments?

This happens to all the time. Whenever we present ourselves for an interview (or your PMS – this is the PMS season, you see) - either for the first time or for the nth time – we tend to rattle off our accomplishments and think that we have ‘impressed’. Have we?

 

Even small little things that are practically routine and incidental to your major task are marked as accomplishments. Actually, these things don’t impress your appraiser! (I have done hundreds of appraisals in my first innings!). This seemingly common fallacy of selling ourselves (in a manner of speaking) is a classic example of what psychologists call the ‘“Presenter’s Paradox.”

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

The problem is that we assume that when we present someone with a list of our accomplishments, we are presenting facts (yes, they are true) additively meaning that if we were to assign scores to each one of the accomplishments, every little accomplishment will add to the total. Yes, numerically true!

 But your interviewer or appraiser does not see it like that. They don’t add but average the scores. So if your denominator is big, your average score comes down? LogicaL! They (that is if they are rational and biased either way and I presume all of them are rational and impartial) tend to see you as whole and not in parts! That means ‘more’ is not necessarily better. If you have accomplished significant things, highlight them. If you add trivial things, your average score will come down and dilute the importance of positive significant things!

“Psychologists Kimberlee Weaver, Stephen Garcia, and Norbert Schwarz recently illustrated the Presenter’s Paradox in an elegant series of studies. For example, they showed that when buyers were presented with an iPod Touch package that contained either an iPod, cover, and one free song download, or just an iPod and cover, they were willing to pay an average of $177 for the package with the download, and $242 for the one without the download. So the addition of the low-value free song download brought down the perceived value of the package by a whopping $65!

Perhaps most troubling, when a second set of participants were asked to play the role of marketer and choose which of the two packages they thought would be more attractive to buyers, 92 percent of them chose the package with the free download. “

If this kind of bias in our day-today living is pervasive, what do we do about correcting this? I don’t have a text book answer. But to my mind let us highlight our major accomplishments and forget the trivia. You will score high!

 

 

 

 

VISA

 

                                                                  VISA

 

I am not talking about your visa card! I am talking about the cherished “VISA” – the one that entitles you to go abroad and stay there for as long as is permitted!

The average (please note I am using ‘average’ and not the extra-ordinary) IIT/IIM student dreams of a visa to go to the US of A, pursue some course there make money and (at the moment of going) return. It is a different matter that most of them choose not to return to ‘Mera Bharat Mahan’.

Be that as it may, why is this visa considered so precious? The widespread view is that USA is a land of opportunities devoid of bias based on caste, creed and what have you. To a large extent this is true. One is recognized for his contribution and not for where he is from or which race or country he belongs to. Compensation is definitely considered more than reasonable for one who contributes and delivers and you do not have to work according to the Indian clock!

 

  In this context, I read recently that some members of the US Congress have invited Mr. Narendra Modi  to visit Obama land – implied in the invitation is the issue (pun intended) of visa, which hitherto had been not considered favourably. And there are people who claim that this invitation is a positive affirmation of Mr. Modi’s credentials to lead the Nation. Earlier he had been invited to deliver a lecture for the Wharton Business School and the invitation was withdrawn with the media making a mountain of this issue.

 

To my mind the invitation and the retraction (forced on it through some protests) were avoidable embarrassments to both the parties. Mr. Modi deserves to be treated a bit more respectfully – it has to be remembered that he has won three elections in the face of severe criticism of some happenings a decade ago and the claim of development – the opposition would have you believe that nothing great has been achieved. The Indian electorate cannot be easily fooled and therefore, I believe that Mr. Modi has perhaps won on merits.

 

I am not concerned with whether Mr. Modi deserves the invitation or not. I am concerned with the ethics of the School in retracting after extending the invitation. A premier business school ought to have examined all the pros and cons of before extending an invitation – the school has fallen in my eyes – a management school ought not to have floundered like this! What kind of management does it teach? Is there a scope for me to write, ‘What they don’t teach at Wharton Business School?

One of the fundamentals of management is to know what I am, where am I and where am I going. That is what Peter Drucker said. An organization that does not know what it is doing and where it is going is set for a slide of Himalayan proportions! I am fairly certain that the management pundits of Wharton know more about study of environmental factors and their impact on whatever we are doing than this scribe knows. Were they not aware of the possible protests for inviting Mr. Modi? And when the protests did happen, why could they not convince the protesters about the rationale of the invitation and the gains to the academic community of the learning that can be derived from Mr. Modi?

Back to the Visa issue!

A US visa means practically an open door to anywhere in the world. I remember my travel agent telling me -when I wanted to go to Dubai- ‘don’t worry Sir, you have US visa for 10 years and so UAE visa is almost automatic! That is the power of US visa!

 

 

And if you have an American passport, you don’t need visa to go anywhere!

 

 

 

 

Time was when the US consulates were very frugal in issuing visa and I understand that there have been substantial relaxations in the recent past. One of my friends who is visiting USA on a package tour was granted visa for 10 years! I remember my visa interview which happened after I retired from service. I was asked what my pension was! I wonder what this had to do with the issue of visa. However, the official was generous enough to grant me a 10 year visa – I had told him that I was visiting US to play with my grand- -child. He appreciated that and wished me fun time with my grand- -daughter. So they are quite considerate and liberal these days. And I had to wait for a few hours to get that visa!

 

Thanks to changed times, you need to go only fifteen minutes before your appointed hour complete your visa interview and presto – you get it or you don’t get it!

 

Today’s newspaper speaks of HIB Visa being issued on the basis of lottery! This, to my mind appears a little stretched! HIB visa, as you know, is issued for those who are to be employed in USA and the visa application has to be sponsored by the employer. The employer sponsors an application based on the candidate’s suitability for appointment in the company. It is not a pilgrimage! Can we then make it a lottery?

 

And let me end with two anecdotes:

First one is ….

A business man called and had a question about the documents he needed in order to fly to China. After a lengthy discussion about passports, I reminded him he needed a visa. "Oh no I don’t, I’ve been to China many times and never had to have one of those." I double checked, and sure enough, his stay required a visa. When I told him this he said, "Look, I’ve been to China four times and every time they have accepted my American Express." (Courtesy - joke Buddha)

Now read the first sentence of this piece

And the second one is ……

(A sad story of a lion…….)
In a poor zoo of India, a lion was frustrated as he was offered not more than 1 kg meat a day.
The lion thought its prayers were answered when one U. S. Zoo Manager visited the zoo and requested the zoo management to shift the lion to the U. S. Zoo.
The lion was so happy and started thinking of a central A/c environment, a goat or two every day and a U. S. Green Card also.
On its first day after arrival, the lion was offered a big bag, sealed very nicely for breakfast. The lion opened it quickly but was shocked to see that it contained few
bananas.
Then the lion thought that maybe they cared too much for him as they were worried about his stomach as he had recently shifted from India.
The next day the same thing happened. On the third day again the same food bag of bananas was delivered.
The lion was so furious, it stopped the delivery boy and blasted at him, and ‘Don’t you know I am the lion... king of the Jungle..., what's wrong with your management? what nonsense is this?, why are you delivering bananas to me?'
The delivery boy politely said,' Sir, I know you are the king of the jungle but. . Did you know that you have been brought here on a monkey's visa!!!
Moral of the story
Better to be a Lion in India than a Monkey elsewhere!!!!! (Courtesy - joke Buddha)

And now, read the first paragraph of this piece!

Get me?

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

VISA

This piece is not about your VISA credit cards!

I am talking about the cherished “VISA” – the one that entitles you to go abroad and stay there for as long as is permitted!

The average (please note I am using ‘average’ and the extra-ordinary)) IIT/IIM student dreams of a visa to go to the US of A, pursue some course there make money and (at the moment of going) return. It is a different matter that most of them choose not to return to ‘Mera Bharat Mahan’.

 

Be that as it may, why is this visa considered so precious? The widespread view is that USA is a land of opportunities devoid of bias based on caste, creed and what have you. To a large extent this is true. One is recognized for his contribution and not for where he is from or which race or country he belongs to. Compensation is definitely considered more than reasonable for one who contributes and delivers and you do not have to work according to the Indian clock!

 

In this context, I read recently that some members of the US Congress have invited Mr. Narendra Modi  to visit Obama land – implied in the invitation is the issue (pun intended) of visa, which hitherto had been not considered favourably. And there are people who claim that this invitation is a positive affirmation of Mr. Modi’s credentials to lead the Nation. Earlier he had been invited to deliver a lecture for the Wharton Business School and the invitation was withdrawn with the media making a mountain of this issue. To my mind the invitation and the retraction (forced on it through some protests) were avoidable embarrassments to both the parties. Mr. Modi deserves to be treated a bit more respectfully – it has to be remembered that he has won three elections in the face of severe criticism of some happenings a decade ago and the claim of development – the opposition would have you believe that nothing great has been achieved. The Indian electorate cannot be easily fooled and therefore, I believe that Mr. Modi has perhaps won on merits.

 

I am not concerned with whether Mr. Modi deserves the invitation or not. I am concerned with the ethics of the School in retracting after extending the invitation. A premier business school ought to have examined all the pros and cons of before extending an invitation – the school has fallen in my eyes – a management school ought not to have floundered like this! What kind of management does it teach? Is there a scope for me to write, ‘What they don’t teach at Wharton Business School?

 

One of the fundamentals of management is to know what I am, where am I and where am I going. That is what Peter Drucker said. An organization that does not know what it is doing and where it is going is set for a slide of Himalayan proportions! I am fairly certain that the management pundits of Wharton know more about study of environmental factors and their impact on whatever we are doing than this scribe knows. Were they not aware of the possible protests for inviting Mr. Modi? And when the protests did happen, why could they not convince the protesters about the rationale of the invitation and the gains to the academic community of the learning that can be derived from Mr. Modi?

 

Back to the Visa issue!

 

A US visa means practically an open door to anywhere in the world. I remember my travel agent telling me -when I wanted to go to Dubai- ‘don’t worry Sir, you have US visa for 10 years and so UAE visa is almost automatic! That is the power of US visa. And if you have an American passport, you don’t need visa to go anywhere!

 

Time was when the US consulates were very frugal in issuing visa and I understand that there have been substantial relaxations in the recent past. One of my friends who is visiting USA on a package tour was granted visa for 10 years! I remember my visa interview which happened after I retired from service. I was asked what my pension was! I wonder what this had to do with the issue of visa. However, the official was generous enough to grant me a 10 year visa – I had told him that I was visiting US to play with my grand- -child. He appreciated that and wished me fun time with my grand- -daughter. So they are quite considerate and liberal these days. And I had to wait for a few hours to get that visa!

 

Thanks to changed times, you need to go only fifteen minutes before your appointed hour complete your visa interview and presto – you get it or you don’t get it!

 

Today’s newspaper speaks of HIB Visa being issued on the basis of lottery! This, to my mind appears a little stretched! HIB visa, as you know, is issued for those who are to be employed in USA and the visa application has to be sponsored by the employer. The employer sponsors an application based on the candidate’s suitability for appointment in the company. It is not a pilgrimage! Can we then make it a lottery?

 

And let me end with two anecdotes:

First one is ….

A business man called and had a question about the documents he needed in order to fly to China. After a lengthy discussion about passports, I reminded him he needed a visa. "Oh no I don’t, I’ve been to China many times and never had to have one of those." I double checked, and sure enough, his stay required a visa. When I told him this he said, "Look, I’ve been to China four times and every time they have accepted my American Express." (Courtesy - joke Buddha) –

 

Now read the first sentence of this piece

And the second one is ……

(A sad story of a lion…….)
In a poor zoo of India, a lion was frustrated as he was offered not more than 1 kg meat a day.
The lion thought its prayers were answered when one U. S. Zoo Manager visited the zoo and requested the zoo management to shift the lion to the U. S. Zoo.
The lion was so happy and started thinking of a central A/c environment, a goat or two every day and a U. S. Green Card also.
On its first day after arrival, the lion was offered a big bag, sealed very nicely for breakfast. The lion opened it quickly but was shocked to see that it contained few
bananas.
Then the lion thought that maybe they cared too much for him as they were worried about his stomach as he had recently shifted from India.
The next day the same thing happened. On the third day again the same food bag of bananas was delivered.
The lion was so furious, it stopped the delivery boy and blasted at him, and ‘Don’t you know I am the lion... king of the Jungle..., what's wrong with your management? what nonsense is this?, why are you delivering bananas to me?'
The delivery boy politely said,' Sir, I know you are the king of the jungle but. . Did you know that you have been brought here on a monkey's visa!!!
Moral of the story
Better to be a Lion in India than a Monkey elsewhere!!!!! (Courtesy - joke Buddha)

And now, read the first paragraph of this piece! Get me?